U.S. Gov. Takes Away Our Last Shred of Personal Freedom: Rolling Meth Labs

This is a truly terrifying time we’re living in, America. We used to be free. We used to be able to do whatever we wanted, regardless of whether or not we we’re hurting ourselves in the process. We used to be able to smoke all the cigarettes we wanted without complaint. Now, smoking has been heavily taxed and stigmatized. And now, America, we’re getting news of yet another infringement on our basic freedoms – on our basic human rights.

Apparently, the Mao, Pol Pot inspired Socialist Nazi’s that make up the Doraville police force in Doraville, Georgia think they know what’s best for the American public. Well guess what, Doraville police? Regardless of what you say or do, I and my fellow patriots will continue to cook our meth while driving on residential streets and interstate highways.

Mobile meth lab-ers unite!

The man that will surely become the martyr of our rolling meth lab movement is Georgia’s own 30-year-old Thomas Christian Johns. Thomas was expressing his constitutionally granted – nay, his God given – right to cook meth in his shady-looking truck while driving around Doraville, Georgia. The only reason he was driving while cooking meth is because of this fascist dictatorship we currently live in that just loves to stigmatize the practice of shady trailers parked in desolate areas that may or may not be cooking potentially lethal narcotics – the lethal narcotics that us patriots love because of the way they change our faces and cause a massive drop in tooth retention.

Thomas was initially pulled over for – get this – not because he was driving a meth wagon (which he was, like a patriot), but because of yet another Obama-inspired Nanny State law: a seat belt violation. Thomas was expressing his God Given right to operate his rolling meth mobile without a seatbelt when an officer spotted him and pulled him over. A few drug sniffing dogs later, the police found and confiscated Thomas’ meth lab — the very same meth lab that he uses to support himself finically and supply Doraville’s children with their steady regimen of crystal meth.

I hope you’re proud of yourselves, Doraville police. You may think you’re just “serving and protecting citizens,” but what you’re really doing, whether you realize it or not, is serving and protecting socialist fascist values.

There is perhaps no better example of this fascist American take over than a quote from Officer Gene Callaway of the Doraville Police Department.

“Mr. Johns was cooking methamphetamine while driving,” he said. “I want to know how this guy didn’t blow up.”

“If the car had exploded while on 285 it could have damaged other cars or caused accidents.”

Just like a fascist socialist; always thinking about the safety of others.

This is a truly sad day, America.