Rep. Alan Grayson Thinks Himself A Congressional Badass
By Luis Prada(If the video doesn’t show up for you, click here to watch it)
There’s a fine line between badass and crazy. Representative Alan Grayson (D-FL) walks that line like John McCLane gingerly tiptoeing across broken glass. As you may have already heard, the other day representative Grayson took the podium to discuss America’s hottest issue, Health Care. Now, these speeches (they’re more like business meeting presentations, really) are usually pretty lame no matter who’s speaking and what party the person represents. Knowing this, Grayson decided to go a little ape shit by saying what he feels is on the mind of every Democrat. He basically said that republicans want Americans to die…but quickly, as not to make your death a big financial strain on your family.
In response, all republicans’ heads exploded.
After they collected their head chunks and meticulously glued them back together (using only the most patriotic of adhesives: liberty) the republicans formed a hard hitting plan of attack that would back Grayson in to a corner and force him to humiliate himself in front of the nation. They asked Grayson to apologize. Being a man of honor and dignity, Grayson took the podium yesterday afternoon to make amends. The Republicans probably thought they had won this little battle in the wider war on Health, but Grayson pulled what politicians call “The Old Switcharoo.”
Grayson just walked right on up there, dropped his balls on to the mic with a thunderous clash, and basically told republicans to go fuck themselves — that he’d rather apologize to dead people than apologize to them. With this move, Grayson has opened the door to all manner of rebel activity in Washington. Soon, congress will not be divided by party affiliation, or by congress and senate, but by the rebel Greasers with their leather jackets, fast cars and fast women, and Jocks with their athletic bodies and ability to suspend a person upside down in a toilet for hours on end. Grayson has a 50-50 shot at setting a precedent that will be either extremely damaging to democracy, or it will reign in a new era of knife fights on the White House lawn and hot rod races down Pennsylvania Avenue.
Again, there’s a fine line between badass and crazy.
