With this next article, I’m going to change it up a bit and try something a little different. I’m going to do the unthinkable as I hand off the content of this article to Youtube commenters. Youtube commmenters are universally known as the dumbest living creatures on the planet. Just because they can string a series of words together to form some kind of logical statement, it doesn’t mean they’re any more evolved than, say, a pair of shoes, or even the soft helmets they have to wear in public. That being said, their comments have a tendency to be extremely entertaining, if only because they make you feel better about your own intelligence.
The comments section I’ve chosen to highlight comes from the video below. It’s short – only 6 seconds long – but from second one you’ll know exactly why this video has 838,689 views and 2,303 comments.
I should warn you, some of the comments are lude and rude. In fact, about 98% of them account for 87% of the meanest shit I’ve ever read.
“what a disgusting fat fuck… see you at the funeral in a couple months unless someone mistakes you for a wild pig and shoots you.”
“I’m trying to figure out what’s more disturbing: the fact that she put up the video or that the video has 837k views.”
“should I feel ashamed for masturbating to this?”
“A wild Snorlax appears!”
“its like porn but this time i dont like it >:(“
“Genuinly gonna be sick LMAO, loose some weight you porker, fucking people in the developing world starving to death and all you can think about is more food more, go suck a big middle aged mans penis and choke on his cum LOL!”
“how do you have enough power to move … that must take a LOT OF GUTS”
“that’s what happens when you get kicked out of beautifulpeople(.)com you start clapping with your fatness O_O”
(NOTE FROM LUIS: “Clapping with your fatness” is the best collection of words I’ve ever read)
“oh honey no! maybe if you try doing that for about 30 minutes a day every day your thunder thighs might shrink a little.”
“close dem fat ass legs smellin like baby butt n mooo an ooooiiiink”
(this one makes no sense, but I completely understand it)
“I’d hate to be little germs on the inside part of her thighs when she does that, having all that flab slam into you.”
“i just barfed out my ass and shit out my mouth”
“*pukes* then laugh”
“this is when blind people are the luckiest sons of bitches alive”
“Looks like a nice place for my face”
“I bet she can also eat a hamburger without opening her mouth -_-“
“Omg !!!! My eyess !! I bet a smell of mixed foods came out of there.”
“thats just nasty she got to the piont were she too lazy to clap with her hands”
“too short clip, I cant masturbate that fast”
“you can clap, but can you stand?”
“but can she have heart failure without her hands?”
“id hit that… with a crowbar!”
Here’s my comment “So, wait. Is she making her vagina clap?”
Sadly, Youtube moderators would never allow my comment. Too much punctuation, and not enough wishing murder or suicide upon the lady in the video.