Crazy Old Lady On a Plane

As if a modern day plane ride weren’t enough of a panic attack — what with the constant fear of it getting exploded by terrorists and all – here’s a video of an old lady that has clearly stopped taking her medication and has replaced her usual doses of Paxil with a very potent batch of LSD.

We feel for the young guy to her left. We really do. How do you react to an old lady that probably thinks she’s on a city bus ride to the local YMCA so she can go about performing one of her normal daily chores: pissing directly in to the public pool from outside of the pool? If you tell her to shut up, you’ll just be attracting attention and making the situation far worse than it needs to be. If you play along with it there’s a good chance she’ll follow you home once the plane lands. If you ignore it, as the guy tried to do, the lady just dials up her crazy to previously unheard of levels in order to get your attention.

It’s a real quandary. Especially for the person to the right of her; the one she keeps talking to. If there even is a person to the right of her. We like to imagine that all seats to her right are empty, with the exception of the window seat, which is being occupied by turquoise elephant with one googly eye and one swirly, hypnotic eye. Every time the old lady something, the silly-eyed turquoise elephant just says “HOooBlY-gOOk!” in a silly Mad-Hatter kind of voice and a nod of agreement before it goes back to doing its 10-dimsnional Sudoku puzzle that replaces all numbers with pictures of dung beetles only distinguishable by their differing styles of party hat.