Crackheads and Cats, More Similar than You’d Think

If you’re a cat owner, then you probably know the joys of watching your cat scurry about frantically as it tries to catch the ever elusive red dot emanating from a laser pointer. Your cat will jump, it will claw, and it will pounce, all in an attempt to capture, and maybe even eat, light. Sure, it’s a cute little game to watch, and it’s good for the cat because it gets them up and moving, and it prevents them from becoming one of those grossly overweight cats whose picture winds up becoming a 4chan Meme. But always, in the back of your head, you know that your cat is stupid. No intelligent creature would ever continuously try to ensnare light, even when it’s failed to do so many, many times in the past. You, of course, immediately banish that thought from your head because, well, it’s a cat. They’re not that smart. Not yet, at least.

This is why the video above is so troubling. And funny.

Apparently, smoking crack will not only destroy your life, and eventually kill you, but it will lower your intellect until you’re as perceptive as an animal that licks its own asshole.

So, if you’ve ever watched a cat have the time of its life as it chases a glowing red dot on a wall or floor, and have wondered what it must feel like to find unbridled joy in something so simple, then just find yourself some crack rock and literally smoke yourself retarded.