Cats: Cute, or Cute and Delicious?

Cats make for wonderful pets. In fact, I once saw a commercial that claimed that simply owning a cat can lower your cholesterol. Cats are like Crestor if Crestor had fur, puked on your sheets and clawed the fuck out of your furniture. But, I wonder, how much would eating a cat raise your cholesterol by? If you had low cholesterol while the cat was alive, would you have even lower cholesterol if you ate it? Or, what if you had two cats, ate one, and then kept the other to pet and love? What happens then, science?

Sadly, the world may never get an answer to that question because it seems the moment someone tries to mention that there are some people in the world that eat cat on a regular basis they get shit canned and silenced.  Like Beppe Bigazzim, a TV chef on Italian state-run TV. Beppe was in his kitchen teaching people at home how to cook some good ol’ fashioned Italian grub. Then, from what I understand, out of nowhere, he goes in to a monologue on how people all over Italy cook and eat cat. He then went in to the details by telling people that the best way to tenderize the meat is by leaving it in a running spring for three days.

Now, I’m a person that loves to cook, and I’m a person that loves cats. As I write this, my cat is sitting on the desk in front of me – looking cute and kind of delicious. So I can see both sides of this issue. So the question then becomes, how do you properly cook a cat? I think this is the underlying issue here. I think this because I didn’t finish reading the article about the Italian chef and his cat cooking controversy, so I assume all the hub-bub is about his recommended method of cat cooking. So I’m going to now use my cooking expertise to fan the flames of this commonly held misunderstanding on how to cook felines.

For starters, cats love catnip. Why not marinate them in it? It just makes sense. I looked up catnip on wiki and found that some people eat the stuff, and others even smoke it. So why not put your cat in a smoker with a little catnip, some garlic and maybe a wedge of lemon?

Or, how about some cart tartar? Anyone can make tartar. It’s just raw meat with some spices and such. That can’t possibly be fucked up.

If you have an recipes, let us know!